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    Mexico Thanksgiving 2009

    November 27th, 2009

    Nice editing of the Flip camera, nice 5-minute summary of a week’s vacation in Mexico over Thanksgiving 2009.

    Note: If for any reason you don’t see the video, click here for the YouTube original.


    Dad Turns 90; Jay’s Haikus

    October 6th, 2009

    Oct. 2, 2009. Dad turns 90. We celebrated the next day, Oct. 3, a Saturday. Martha arranged it, and gave a very nice speech. Then Jay pulled out his haikus. I hope to post the video on YouTube, but I’m also going to try to recreate some of his commentary, aside from the actual haikus themselves. Where I don’t have commentary it’s because I don’t remember.

    Thia first one is very familiar to the three of us, me and Chip and Jay, who grew up watching football with dad.

    Grass is greener

    Things not great on the field
    What the heck is goin on?
    Put in that freshman.

    Unholy Thing
    Dad drinks his vodka
    he likes it mixed with milk. Yuk.
    I want to throw up.

    Everybody in our family knows that dad has always liked his licorice more than any other sweets. Not unlike me. Here’s Jay’s tribute:

    Black Goddess

    Dad turning ninety!
    Think of all the licorice
    This man has eaten.

    Good, True, and Beautiful

    He comes from the Church
    Virgin Mary watches him
    St. Michael protects

    His Lucky Day

    After tragic loss
    He sure did strike it lucky
    When he found liz

    First, we learned that wonderful Irish grandfather Jack O’Neill was actually mom’s stepfather, not real DNA for us. At least we were 100% Irish on Dad’s side — until the discovery, 10 or so years ago, that the Dudley in dad’s background was actually Dudelein, and we was French.

    Le Crushing Truth (Family Tree Shockeroo!)

    Presumed all Irish
    Til shocking revelation
    Dudley’s Dudler

    Jay pointed out how quick dad was to warn us about “ballooning up” and other familiar “don’t get fat” phrases. And that he had eaten 39 its-it (an ice cream treat popular in the San Francisco area) in a single weekend.

    Dad’s World Record

    Ya gotta, gotta
    push yourself away from that
    thirty ninth It’s it.

    It turned out later that Uncle Cal had secretly bought a ping pong table and had been practicing for months when he, with pretended nonchalance, challenged dad to ping pong.

    Ping Pong Apocalypse
    Uncle Cal ready.
    Dad plays with gin on table.
    Dad whips Cal’s butt bad.

    Jay wasn’t sure this actually happened and suggested he dreamt it because of something that had been said. Martha thought it did in fact happen (he is an ophthalmologist).

    Weird Day Job
    He removes eye balls,
    Brings them home to show his kids.
    They gleam on the shelf.

    Controversy broke out in the neighborhood as the Knights planted trees that threatened the view. There was a discussion but Mr. Knight was unmoved and unsympathetic.

    Bad Night for Mr. Knight
    Tiptoe to Knight’s yard
    One strange and moonless evening;
    Too bad for that tree.

    For many years in a row, Gram sent dad balloon seat pajamas for Christmas. We all laughed.

    The Gift She Keeps on Giving
    Each Berry Christmas,
    The gift of hysteria,
    Balloon Seat Classic.

    Mushy But True
    Language is useless.
    Words don’t capture the feeling.
    We love Dad so much.


    Developer Sandbox Interviews: Paul Berry

    June 30th, 2009

    If you don’t see the video here, you can click this link to go to the youtube source.


    The Rock has Holes, but it Stays Together

    May 30th, 2009
    • I guess that all families that stay together, that stick, that have vacations together, also have their bad moments. Like a banana turned brown, sitting uncomfortably in the middle of a large display of fresh fruit. Some people remember the good, and some remember the bad. I choose to remember the good. But the banana stands out.
    • Grandkids on the beach.

    • Sleeping in the shadow of an early alarm, the alarm always present, threatening sleep, keeping me awake. Not sleeping. Breathe deeply. Not sleeping. Then the light, well before dawn. Laura calls, on her way. Packing, parking, checking luggage. The Parsons in order, organized. Christopher and Laura flapping loose.
    • IMG_0165

    • Nana is a magnet. They grab her hand, wait for her glance, show her their things. Nana takes care of them.
    • Three boys in the airport. Running. Shouting. Five, almost five, and two. Leo basking in the five-year-old glow. Christopher runs ahead in the Denver airport, wearing a bright green shirt. Laura follows, Timmy runs too, I lose sight of them. They reassemble. We organize our carry-on food for the next plane.
    • Paul is waiting in the lobby of the new place. Kidani, starts with Kid. Eva hugging. She says "granddad" very well.  She hugs me very well.  She hugs her Nana.
    • Monday morning, I hear Paul and his two kids from under the blankets and pillows in the bed in the hallway, trying to keep them quiet, not to wake me. Instead, we walk together, four of us, for coffee in the morning quiet before the heat. Eva says "granddad" beautifully, like she particularly enjoys the r sound. She holds my hand. Paul walks with Boyan beaming on his shoulder. Disney is waking up.
    • Christopher is sick on Monday morning. Laura and Christopher stay behind.
    • "Scary" is an issue. Eva, squirming in Paul’s arms, trying to escape the "scary" as we wait for the Small World. The ramp for the line goes slanting downwards with switchbacks. Paul takes Eva out of the line, to her great relief, to freedom from "scary." 
    • "Granddad comes too," Timmy says as he grabs my hand. Noah and Timmy and I go for the pirates while Vange and Sabrina and Leo and Paul and Eva hanging out in the kids areas, avoiding scary. He wants me to come with. I feel like a prize. We go to the pirates, walking fast, Noah and Timmy and I, cutting our way through the heat, like through the jungle with machetes.  Timmy holds my hand tightly. Timmy soaks the pirates in, glowing in the dark, pointing to everything.  Through the heat again, fast, and we do the haunted house too. Timmy holds tight, likes being scared.
    • "We saw the real Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty, mommy. No masks, no wigs," Timmy said, afterwards. That night we went back on the air conditioned bus through the heat at dusk to the VIP seats in the parade. We sat in the roped-off benches, front row. People asked how we got there. "Our son knows people." Timmy basked in his birthday. Characters stopped by to wish him well. The floats glided by glistening, flashing, brilliantly lit, Disney in all its mechanical magical carefully managed glory.
    • Christopher was asleep long before we got back to Kidani. We decided we made the right choice.
    • Tuesday morning, Animal Kingdom. Once again we split up, and Timmy grabs me like a prize, holding my hand, "granddad comes too." Noah and Timmy and I go through the river rapids ride. Timmy gets soaking wet and, despite the thick heat, it bothers him.
    • Waiting at the fence for the train that goes back and forth from petting zoo, Leo looks up at me: "Granddad, uppy uppy, it’s coming, I have to see." Leo loves trains.
    • Laura and Christopher woke up early Tuesday and went to the Magic Kingdom the two of them, mother and son, happily. They saw the parade. Laura found perfect seats. Christopher did Buzz Lightyear six times.
    • Boyan in the swimming pool that afternoon, his worried look disappears over and over again into a beaming smile. Happy baby. Paul with Boyan. Happy daddy. Which reminds me, Paul and Eva, Paul and Boyan, different times, different places, "Daddy" and "Tatti" over and over.
    • Sabrina and Noah and Timmy and Leo having fun. Sabrina asks me to watch Timmy, off on his own, squirting people with a big squirter cannon. Timmy’s grin has become engraved on his face, permanent.
    • Leo over and over is swept up with the other two boys, riding their games like a surfer riding a wave. Eva watches, joins, but carefully.
    • Wednesday morning, divided again, Sabrina and I take Leo on the train. We point out the mechanical memories, carefully assembled. Leo stares out intently, not talking.
    • Christopher soaks in the small world, pointing everything out, one by one, look at this, look at that. He sings along.
    • At Captain Hiram’s, the boys hang onto the side railing by the table, hanging out over the water, throwing crayons. They look like dogs at the windows of moving cars. There is a pleasant steady breeze.
    • Christopher loves the ocean. With Laura holding and helping, he dives under waves and jumps over waves. He can stay in the ocean forever. He holds my hand, jumping the waves. 
    • Friday morning, Eva and I walk to the swimming pool alone, the two of us. She holds my hand. We swim together in the pool. We talk about the slide.
    • Vange takes walks on the beach, manages lunch, watches the kids for sunblock blanks, being Nana.
    • In the pool with the slide, I catch Eva, like we rehearsed in the morning. And then I catch Leo, with his brilliant smiling eyes.
    • Vange finds an ocean rock on the beach, a leatherish brown color, smoothed, with lots of holes, about the size of her hand. "Look," she says, "it’s like a family. It has holes, but it stays together. It is still a rock."
    • Eva carefully lays out her four small princesses, the prize from Nana, counts them and cares for them one by one. Boyan runs in and grabs one, over and over, shrieking, throwing it when she protests.
    • On the last day, midday Sun, we walked on the beach. All the way up and back.

    Surviving the Plane with Toddlers

    March 22nd, 2009

    (Note: I took the liberty of picking this up from MommyCEO and posting it here. Tim)

    My kids and I travel. A Lot. Both my kids are United Premier members due to the number of miles they have flown with me and my husband in the past year. We live in Eugene, Oregon and have flown with our kids to London (3 times), Barcelona, Istanbul, all over Mexico ( a lot of my family is there), Boston (my husband’s family lives there), NYC (my brother lives there), Miami, Denver, New Orleans, Chicago, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Portland Maine, and the list goes on. I am very proud to say that I have never gotten off a flight without other passengers commenting, surprised, on what good travelers the kids are. In our most recent plane flight back from London (via San Francisco, a hellish 12 hour plane ride) a flight attendant said I should write tips and tricks for other parents. She said she had never in her 20 years of flying seen kids who behaved as well as mine on a long flight. The kids were 2 and 4 at the time of the flights.

    Now lets be serious. I wish I could tell you in that smug parent way that my kids are always well behaved. I like to think that my husband and i are good parents– but our kids are by no means perfect. They have their meltdowns. They have their “fits” (tantrums as described by my four year old). They fight with each other, they don’t always listen. Just like any normal 2 and 4 year old. But so far we have been able to avoid having any major meltdowns on a plane or in an airport (OK now I feel like I may jinx our next trip!!!). So I thought I might heed the flight attendants request and give you some do’s and don’ts for plane travel with kids. None of these are guarantees, but they have worked for our family. Let’s start with the DONT’S:

    1. DON’T bring large STUFF. The last time I boarded a plane I watched a couple with their less than 1 year old twins get on a plane. Each parent carried a baby, and a stuffed bear the size of the baby. They had not bought seats for the babies, which is fine, but they sat there trying to juggle the babies and these ridiculous bears on their laps. Truly, truly how much entertainment can a large stuffed bear bring to a nine month old? This also means don’t bring pillows, or large blankets. A comfort blankie for a small baby is a must — but a bed sized quilt — not good for anyone.
    2. DON’T  bring lots of small toys with little parts.Your kids won’t care. The toys will go every where and you won’t find them. Junior may scream because the toys can not be found. Junior can throw the toys (not a good thing!). Junior is more interested in pulling the window shade open and shut, taking the in-flight magazine in and out of the pocket in front of them, trying to “use” the in-flight phone, and playing with the pretzels and or plastic cups. Everything on the plane is more interesting than any toys you may bring. toys take up room, are usually bulky and your child will use them for about 2 min. Skip them
    3. DON’T bring a baby car seat on board unless your baby truly LOVES the seat and just wants to hang out there ALL THE TIME. The reality is — if the plane actually crashes — everyone is in trouble. Car seats take up a TON of room, and prevent you from letting your child move a little bit — and be less sedentary.
    4. Unless your child is 5 or more, and really does love to color, skip the crayons and pens. Just like the small toys, in about 2 minutes they are rolling all over the floor of the plane. Ad pens lose their caps and make kids upset. Chances are, your little one won’t really color for more than 15-20 minutes before they get bored
    5. DON’T  fool yourself and bring entertainment and reading material for yourself. It just takes up precious space in your carry-on and believe me — you won’t have time. If you are very very lucky you may be able to close your eyes for 30 minutes. Your purpose on the plane is to be completely attentive to the needs of your child, anticipating their hunger, moods, sleepiness, etc. so that you can keep things going smoothly. We all know that once the tantrum or crying fits starts — its very hard to stop. The name of the game if avoidance and distraction. You will become the mommy and or daddy circus.
    6. DON’T  treat good behavior on planes with candy.  Don’t get lose because you are traveling and buy them sweets. You WILL regret this as will your fellow passengers.
    1. DO understand that the name of the game while traveling with young kids and babies is SELF SUFFICIENCY. Do not rely on the airline or anyone else to provide your child’s needs.
    2. DO pack lightly. This helps you be self sufficient. My husband and I bought these bags from Costco about 2 years ago and love them for travel with the kids. They open up to have 2 separate sides, so I pack each child on one side in one bag, and my husband and I do the same in the other bag. All 4 of us travel with just those 2 bags as checked luggage – no matter how far or long we are going. If it doesn’t fit into those bags, we just don’t take it. As long as you are not packing HEAVY things like large shampoo bottles or heavy electronics these bag pack full and are still under 50 lbs – the current limit on checked bags for most airlines.  My husband can roll these 2 bags without anyone helping him, and I deal with the 2 kids in a double stroller.  I carry a backpack carry-on as does my husband. We have walk over 6 city blocks in Manhattan and London with our luggage and kids to get transportation to the airport — without needing any help.  My kids do know that when we are in a hurry or have to get somewhere with them and the luggage they MUST sit in the stroller.
    3. DO bring a stroller, even if you think your child is old enough. Airports mean LOTS of walking, sometimes very quickly to get a connection, and with often kids that are very tired from early flights or missed naps.  Worst case your stroller can carry things and your child can walk. best case you can put both kids in it and RUN from Gate 22 in Denver all the way to Gate 98 to catch that last flight to Eugene. Yes I have done it.  Our kids are now going on 5 ad 3, and for the next 3 trips we have planned, 2 across the country and one down to San Francisco, I still plan on bringingthe double stroller.  I have a McClaren Twin Triumph. It is super lightweight, folds like an umbrella stroller,  fits through ALL doors, and supports 55 pounds per side.
    4. DO understand that your carry-on luggage is not yours. It is your child’s (or children’s). Bring one bag, preferably a back-pack (hands free is key). This bag will carry everything you need to sustain your kid(s) for the next 24 hours. You want to make sure you are prepared for delays, cancellations, late arrivals and lost luggage. I always pack:
      • 2 changes of clothes for each child including underwear and socks. I have had a child have a pee accident which not only wets his pants and underwear, but his shoes and socks as well. A nice clean pair of synthetic socks can make a BIG difference. If you pack one change of clothes, Murphy’s Law states that your child will spill their orange juice all over them at breakfast at the airport AFTER check-in, and you will face a 12 hour day of travel with no extra clothes. Believe me. I have been there.
      • enough diapers to make it through 24 hours in case your luggage doesn’t show up
      • enough wipes to use them liberally for everything from diaper changes to pseudo sponge baths
      • Baby/kids tylenol, motrin, and benadryl. Most USA airports let you take baby/kid stuff through security that is more than 3.4 ounces. If you are not sure — but airport size containers that are child safe, and tranfer your medicines into them — well marked. You don’t want to face a fever/ear ache/flu mid way through your flight with no medicine.
      • a thermometer. A plane is not the palce to argue with your husband about whether baby has a fever or not. Make it simple – pack the termometer.
      • Water bottle or sippy cup. My kids have the 13 oz SIGG bottles which are easy to travel with.  You will have to take them through security EMPTY and then buy water after security.
      • Healthy, filling, fun food. It takes creativity but you can find snack type food that does well on flights, but in a pinch can sustain a little one for hours and hours. My favorites are: Pirate’s Booty, Barabra’’s individually packed vanilla animal crackers, organic individually wrapped cheese sticks, whole wheat goldfish, small little apples, individual organic apple sauce containers, pretzels (although United gives those out and the kids like getting them), kid cliff bars, little jars of Organic Baby brand baby food (when the kids were infants).
    5. DO  bring “real” age appropriate entertainment. A few paperback books with favorite stories are easy to pack and keep kids happy. My husband and I sucked it up and got the kids IPODS to travel with. We purchase movies and tv shows for them. The kids have entertainment that they like and we get a little peace and quiet. Kids really have to be about 2 yrs old to be able to watch any shows — otherwise they just don’t have the attention span. And yes, I know TV is bad for babies and young kids. Our kids watch very little to none at home — so traveling with their IPODs is a real treat. When you are traveling wtih a baby under 2, baby books and food along with comfort items do the trick.
    6. DO bring a BIG bottle of sanitizer.  A flight attendant once watched me use a baby wipe with sanitizer to wipe down the seat rests, tray table, window, window shade, and all buttons accessible to children. She said to me “aha you figured out the secret to reducing sickness. All flight attendants do exactly what you are doing. You would NOT ant to know the germs that are on those seats!  Maybe I am crazy. Maybe I am too anal. But I swear to you I think it helps reduce illness while traveling.  I dispense the sanitizer liberally while in airports and on planes. I have actually been asked on multiple occasions by fellow travelers if they too can have a baby wipe with sanitizer to clean off their area.
    7. Do bring COMFORT sleep-inducing items. Hopefully your child has one or a few. Our kids both had small blankies they loved as babies and between that a nursing they would be off to sleep in minutes. When they got older and stopped nursing I let them have bottles and or warm milk in sippies. For our kids all it takes to get them to sleep on flights when tired is  lying down in the seat with a bunch of airplane pillows and some warm milk. Our older child no longer naps — but is happy to rest and watch some PBS shoes on his IPOD with his warm milk. It is very calming for him. When we take the over night flight to London (we go at least once a year if not more for business and family) I bring PJ’s to change the kids into on the plane. It helps them understand that it is night time and they need to go to sleep.
    8. Do talk to your kids about what is going to happen. Even at a young age. When they are very little you can read them plane books and get them excited about planes. As they get older you can go into more details. Because we live in a small town we are usually 2 flights from anywhere.  My 4 year old does really well when I lay out the trip for him in detail. I tell him when we are going to go to the airport (sometimes it is “in the middle of the night” as he says, because we have a 6am flight. Other times it is later in the afternoon because our connection is a night flight. We start discussing the trip a good month ahead of time, and work up to more and more details. He usually can tell you on the day of travel how many planes we will be on, and what our layover cities will be, and what meals we will be eating at the airport.  If plans change during the trip – I tell the kids.  Last summer we had 3 flights to get back from Portland Maine to Eugene Oregon. Our flight was so delayed into Denver we didn’t think we would make the last flight to Eugene. We told both kids (but particularly aimed the discussion at the 4 year old) so that they knew we would have to run — and that even while running we may not make the flight. Our 4 year old was so cooperative because he KNEW what to expect. He ran almost the whole way and was excited about the “adventure” of it all. He also know that if we didn’t run we wouldn’t make the plane, but even if we ran we still might not make the plane. HE was totally on board and thrilled to bits that we made it, forgetting that he had been promised whatever he wanted for dinner in the Denver airport. Had we not told him and simply dragged him along — we could have been in for one of his famous “fits”.  Kids do better when they know what to expect, just like adults do.

    So maybe you think I am crazy. Maybe you think I shouldn’t drag my kids all over the place. But I love traveling with my kids, and I love exposing them to dofferent places. I travel a lot for business and have been lucky enough to take along my mom to help out – or my husband (who runs the business with me) will also come, so we bring the kids. The more we travel the more miles we build up, which we now use almost exclusively to bring along family members for help when we travel with the kids for business. Last year our kids clocked 50,000 miles apiece. They love to travel and still get excited about trips. I like to think we are doing something right … but I am always open to suggestions and feedback!


    Why I Write

    March 22nd, 2009

    Chris Brogan writes Want to Know the Real Reason Why You Write on his copyblogger blog. He’s one of the best, and one of the best known, bloggers. He has hundreds of thousands of subscribers.

    I got to thinking about it when a commenter on a previous post said that most people would love to write because there’s some kind of natural pull towards writing. I was also intrigued when I saw that established and well known bloggers Holly Hoffman and Jamie Harrop both started up brand new blogs last week, with subjects close to their hearts.

    “Why?” He asks. Because what they were doing, the blogs they’d built, helped them discover their real voices. But they weren’t their real voices.

    That’s a lot of what blogging could be about. Chris continues…

    Think about it for a moment. What are you speaking with before you find your voice? What are you saying and what message are you delivering? And just who are you being before you find your voice?

    Before that happens your writing will be more constructed, abstracted, intellectualized. It’ll probably feel more of a struggle to get the words onto the page for the simple reason that you’re missing something fundamental.

    You.

    Both Holly and Jamie mentioned this very thing when explaining their need to start a new blog – that they needed to write about what they really wanted to write about, and to get a better fit by moving away from the constraints of their previous blog.

    My main blogging is about business. I work to build traffic. This blog is for us. I wish we used it more.


    San Miguel 2008

    January 10th, 2009



    Leo_and_me_walking

    Originally uploaded by tim_berry

    This is just the first of many. Picture by Noah. Walking down from their house to the bakery on a sunny afternoon.


    Beautiful Fall Day

    October 25th, 2008


    IMG_1787.JPG

    Originally uploaded by tim_berry

    Dad and Liz took a river trip out of Portland, then came down to Eugene with me to spend the weekend. This was carving pumpkins on the patio.


    The Chez Franc Vineyard

    October 3rd, 2008


    The Chez Franc Vineyard

    Originally uploaded by tim_berry

    This was taken Oct. 3, 2008, one day after his 89th birthday. Standing outside the vineyard on a sunny Saturday morning. I had a great visit that weekend, dinner with Dad and Liz and Megan Friday night in a really good Indian restaurant, Mantra, then a nice Saturday afternoon with Megan too.


    Chicago

    September 7th, 2008

    Rain, rain, rain. A beautiful view from the 53rd floor. The first day was just cloudy, the second day rained all day, and we had work to do at the ASBDC. I was told that Leo especially loved the Science and Art museum, which was full of trains.

    Then I went home and they went to Maine.

    img-0098.jpg

    img-0099.jpg

    Strange weather for Chicago in the first week of September.